see we do tummy time!

We struggle with tummy time.  The boys just do not like it one bit.  I keep telling them they need to do tummy time or else they are going to go to college and not know how to roll over!!

But here is some proof from yesterday that tummy time does happen (on occasion) in our house.  And we love to do tummy time on our pink mat.  Thank You Uncle Matt!! (sorry we weren't girls like you were hoping)

Jakob

Alex

Mary

ready, set, go ??? (and other ramblings)

We made the decision to give cereal a try just over a week ago.  The first time around the boys did wonderful!  And we go some super cute video!  We gave them each about five spoonfuls of cereal and for the most part they seemed to enjoy it.  They would both make a "yucky" face when you put the spoon in their mouth but then they would swallow the cereal and get the look of "this isn't too bad" on their face.  But then the next few days did not go all that great.  The boys were spitting out most of the cereal.  And with everything I read that is a big sign that they aren't ready for solid foods.  So we decided to take a temporary break from the solid foods.  There is really no reason at this point that we need to be feeding them cereal.  They take their bottles like champs.  They are sleeping through the night for the most part.  And the pediatrician indicated that it would be perfectly acceptable for them to come back at their six month appointment still on breast milk only.  I have to remember that they are still only a bit over 3 months old adjusted age.  So I think for now we are just going to play it by ear.  I really want to do some reading on baby led weaning.  I think for the moment I might be more inclined to start (at minimum) with vegetables around six months old and actually skip the cereal altogether.  But I'm also inclined to learn more about skipping purees altogether.  But if I have learned anything over the last several months its that Kara and I will eventually know what is right for the boys.  I have to stop over analyzing things so much and just go with the flow.  And for the moment that means we are skipping the introduction of solid foods.

I have dropped another pumping session.  And let me tell you ... I feel like I got a part of my life back!!!  I now pump at 1:30 am, 5:30 am, 10:30 am, 3:30 pm, and 8:30 pm.  It has been a week and I only noticed a slight drop in my supply.  I averaged about 1/2 ounce less per day last week then I did the week before when I was still pumping six times per day.  I still average over 60 oz per day so I am able to keep up with the boys demand.  There are days when the boys get an extra bottle and thus consume about 64 oz for the day.  But we have been turning to our freezer supply for those days.  I feel as if I could go for an indefinite period of time at five pumps per day.  Obviously my first goal is still to keep the boys only on breast milk until six months but in the end I really want to get them to their first birthday.  I am blessed to have a decent supply and I don't want to take that for granted for a second.  I know there are a lot of women who would give their left leg for such a supply so the last thing I want to do is stop pumping simply because I am "tired" of doing it.  I was born a math nerd so of course I have been documenting my daily numbers for some time now.  However, I didn't start recording my numbers until the boys were two months old because it never dawned on me to do such a thing.  Plus I was in the newborn twin fog!  But since July 13, 2012 I have pumped 523 times for a total of 5,127 oz of milk or an average of 9.8 oz per session. Did you let that sink in?

And finally in other news (before I conclude this blog of very random topics) I got the nerve to call the sperm bank last week to ask about the number of vials that remain available for purchase from our donor.  And the good news ... No one knows that CB*** makes adorable little kids!!!  I purchased our vials from this donor between January 2011 and April 2011 and no additional vials have been bought since my last purchase in April 2011!!!  And because our donor has 121 vials available for purchase (our donor had 127 vials available when I first called the sperm bank in late 2010) Kara and I can take a breather and not be forced to make any decisions about a future sibling for a long time!!!  We decided to just give the sperm bank a call every six months until we make a final decision about what we want to do.  I am glad to be able to move this worry off of the table for a bit and just to be able to concentrate on enjoying Jakob and Alex.        

Mary

a year of Jakob and Alex

We were busy this weekend so I didn't get to properly document September 29, 2012!  We officially reached the end of the year of Jakob and Alex.  It was one year ago that I had the IUI that resulted in my pregnancy with Jakob and Alex.  So I like to think of the boys as officially being part of our lives for one year.  I have spent the last several days going "One year ago today ..."  all while trying not to spontaneously break into tears.  There are many things I remember about September 29, 2011 that I probably would have pushed out of my mind should I not have gotten pregnant.  I took the day off of work.  I would like to pretend I took the day off of work to sit at home and relax after my  IUI but really I took the day off to work on a backlog of homework assignments.  I did stop at the office prior to my appointment because our office was participating in health screenings in order to secure a lower premium on our health insurance for 2012.  I of course was super nervous because of my appointment.  So my blood pressure was a bit high.  The nurse doing the health screening thought I was nervous because of the blood draw at the screening.  Not really!  But I humored her and admitted to a deathly fear of needles.  I also remember during the actual IUI my cell phone rang.  I must have forgotten to turn it off.  The RE made some off the cuff comment about whether or not she needed to answer the phone for me since I was currently indisposed!  I checked my phone after the IUI and it was a picture of my good friend's twin girls who were just newborns at the time.  My friend had sent me the picture to wish me good luck at the IUI.  It worked!  I would not know it at the time but hours later I would be pregnant with Jakob and Alex!!  It has been a very good year!  I feel so blessed.  

A couple of pictures from last week.

Jakob

Mr. Jakob laughs ALL THE TIME!!  His laughter is super contagious.  He loves to bounce.  Jakob loves it even more when you pretend to drop him while bouncing.  He will just laugh and laugh and laugh.  He also does this little squeal at the end of each round of laughing that makes my heart smile.  We actually bought an exercise ball over the weekend to help with Jakob's love of bouncing.  Also both boys tend to fall asleep when you are bouncing so we thought an exercise ball would be really helpful during fussy time.  Plus it is good for us too!!  It is hard to bounce the boys while sitting on the couch.  The exercise ball has also been helpful to use for some tummy time.  Of course Jakob laughs the whole time!

Alex

This is a picture of Mr. Serious.  I absolutely love this picture.  It appropriately documents his personality!  I think Alex spends most of his time trying to figure out the world.  He will probably be our cautious child while Jakob ends up in the emergency room a bazillion time because he will also act before he thinks!  I would give anything to know what Alex is thinking at any given moment.  I also love this picture because it includes his new obsession 'Robbie the Robot'!  Alex loves to grab onto 'Robbie the Robot' and I think it brings our non-pacifier child some extra comfort.

Mary

i never did like multiple choice tests

Let's begin with some cuteness!

It finally felt like fall over the weekend.  And fall is my absolute most favorite time of the year.  We had to bundle the boys up a bit when we took them on our nightly walk.  And of course that lead to a lot of cuteness.

Alex

Jakob

From the moment I got pregnant I always assumed that Jakob and Alex would be our only children.  Kara and I had always talked about having two kids and then we got pregnant with twins and it just seemed like our family was going to be complete in one swoop.  Plus I didn't exactly have a picture perfect pregnancy and so often we made the comment "God knew we wanted two children so we were blessed with twins so that I wouldn't have to ever be pregnant again".  In fact, I often got asked when I was pregnant whether or not we would have more children.  My response was always, "Nope.  We got our instant family."  I think I told my OB this exact sentiment at least a handful of times during my pregnancy.  And then the boys were born.  And now Kara and I don't know if our family is complete.  We feel differently almost every day.  Under "traditional" circumstances this would not be a problem.  We would just make the decision a couple of years down the road.  But Kara and I do not have a "traditional" family.  And so this forces us to make decisions about our future in the next few months that I really wish I did not have to make in such a quick time frame.  

So what are our options?  And what are our current obstacles?

We currently have one IUI ready vial from our donor being stored at our RE's office.  We have to pay a yearly storage fee to keep this vial at the location.  If you compare the current cost of one vial ($515) versus the yearly storage cost (about $100 per year), then it would make sense to continue to pay the storage fee for a couple of years versus having the vial destroyed and starting from scratch with a new vial should we decide to try and get pregnant in a couple of years.  But if we decide to not get pregnant then we could be out a few hundred dollars.  Not a big deal.  So this is the least of our worries.  Our bigger concern at the moment ... Do we buy more IUI ready vials from the cyrobank?  Like I mentioned above we only have one IUI ready vial from our donor.  There is no guarantee, should we decide to have another child in a couple of years, that our donor would have any vials left for purchase.  I am for certain that I want our children to be at least half-siblings.  In all probability, although stranger things have happened, I would be the one to get pregnant again.  This would mean our children would be full siblings if we used the same donor or half-siblings if we used a different donor.  However, should we decide that Kara would be the one to get pregnant, then I would absolutely want to use the same donor so that our children are at least half-siblings with each other.  Plus, there is a part of me that feels, if we were to have another child, it would be difficult for that child, especially if he or she is a singleton, to genetically be connected to a donor different from the donor we used for Jakob and Alex.  That's just my feelings.  So this is the reason a decision needs to be made soon.  We can purchase additional IUI ready vials but then so many questions come to the surface.  How many vials do we purchase?  It took us 5 tries to get pregnant with Jakob and Alex.  I will be older in a couple of years.  Strike 1.  And I got pregnant with the help of fertility medication.  I would like to avoid the use of fertility medications if we decide to get pregnant again.  I do not think my body could handle another multiple pregnancy.  Strike 2.  So do I expect it to take 6 or 7 or 8 tries the next time.  What happens if we purchase a handful of vials and amazingly we get pregnant on the first attempt?  We would have a number of vials left in our possession.  But what happens if we purchase a handful of vials and we are unable to get pregnant before we run out of vials?  There is a part of me that feels like we should just use the one vial we have in a couple of years.  If we get pregnant, then that would be wonderful.  If we don't get pregnant, then that would be the sign that our family is complete.  But really people ... that's like telling a straight couple you only get to have sex one time to try and finish your family.  So really that is unrealistic.  And then there is the financial aspect of the whole process.  Remember I said that each IUI ready vial is approximately $500?  Kara and I are by no means a wealthy family.  So to turnover an extra $3,000 - $5,000 is not a walk in the park.  Plus the cryobank has an annual storage fee of $340.  Yikes!  The cryobank will "buy" back any unused vials only if the donor is still in the program.  This would be unlikely considering we would only be  buying the vials should the number of vials available for purchase from our donor be getting smaller.  Plus they only buy back the vials after taking a 30% restocking fee.  So there is a part of me that just wants to live in denial.  I'm just going to pretend that no one else will purchase vials from our donor.  And the vials will be waiting for us should we choose to expand our family.  Okay.  That's unrealistic too.  I guess I just need to get the courage to pick-up the phone and call the cyrobank to see how many IUI ready vials our donor has remaining in stock.  Maybe the only vials the donor has sold will be the ones that Kara and I purchased almost two years ago!  It would at least be a baby step in the right direction.  Did I mention that I always hated multiple choice tests?  I always over analyzed each possible choice and in the end I always seemed to make the wrong choice!

Mary

what's going on

The boys continue to change right before our eyes!

I stole this from a friend.

Age: The boys are 4 months and 1 week old.

Weight:  Jakob weighs 11 lbs 15 oz and Alex weighs 11 lbs 10 oz.  This barely puts the boys on the growth chart for their age but the pediatrician expects them to be well on the chart by the end of their first year.

Length:  Both boys are 24 inches long.  

Clothes:  The boys can still fit into some clothes that are 0-3 months but seem to be wearing more 3-6 month and 6 month outfits as of late.  They are in 3-6 month sleepers at night.  They are growing out of clothes so fast!!

What are we eating?:  We FINALLY have the boys on a regular eating schedule.  Hip Hip Hooray!  The boys are taking 5 oz of breast milk at 5am, 8am, 11am, 2pm, 5pm, 8pm.  We have been given the green light to start solids whenever we feel the boys are ready to give it a go.  I was super excited to start solids but now that the boys are actually following a regular eating schedule my excitement has minimized a bit.  I think we will just play it by ear.  There is part of me that would like to wait until the boys are 6 months old to introduce solids.  But then again things change so fast around these parts that come next week I could be shoving cereal down their throats!

How are we sleeping?:  I am no longer sleep deprived!  The boys still go to bed at 8pm each night.  There are some nights it is a challenge to get Jakob to fall asleep.  Because the boys will not take a pacifier they often fuss for several minutes before they fall asleep.  I usually just sit by their Rock N Plays and rock them back and forth until the fall asleep.  They will stay asleep until anywhere between 4am - 7am.  Kara will get up and give them their "5 am" bottle whenever they wake-up.  They then go back to sleep until 8:30am.  We usually have to wake them up at 8:30am.  I know there is often a "four month wakeful period" but I am crossing my fingers we don't experience that one.  I know we are SUPER, SUPER lucky in how well the boys sleep for us.  Let's keep it up boys!!  Our next big project will be to transition the boys to their cribs.  This absolutely terrifies me for a number of reasons.

What's going on?:  They accomplish something new each day!

Jakob "officially" rolled over from his belly to his back on September 19th.  There were a couple of times Jakob "rolled" over from his belly to his back when we first brought them home from the hospital but I'm not really counting those moments because there was no intent in the action.  It just sort of happened.  Jakob is also really close to rolling from his back to his belly.  He automatically turns to his side when you put him on his back.  Jakob still loves to watch his Baby Einstein video.  He absolutely loves colors and music.  We have a little Baby Einstein music player and he loves when we play it for him.  Jakob is grabbing for objects when they are put in front of his face.  He now understands opening and closing his fists to grasp an object.  Alex is also reaching for objects in front of his face but he has not quite mastered the opening and closing of his fist.  Both boys are bringing objects up to their mouths constantly.  And the drool?  It is crazy.  They drool all the time and we often have to have the boys in bibs during the day.  Alex still LOVES his jumperoo and will actually give Jakob the side-eye if he is spending time in the jumperoo.  Both boys will put weight on their legs if you allow them to.

Their personalities are so different.  Alex is so serious!  It takes a lot of effort to get that boy to smile and laugh.  And often times you will get him to laugh and then he will give you this look that means "Oh no!  They saw me laugh.  Now what will they think?"  But Jakob on the other hand laughs all the time.  He will laugh and smile for anyone that comes up to him.  I still believes that Jakob feels every emotion to the extreme.  This means if Jakob is hungry he is really, really, really hungry.  If Jakob is happy, then he is really, really, really happy.  There is no middle ground for Jakob.  Alex never really gets upset about anything but he does have "whining" down to a science.  He will just start to whimper and then you can't help but go and pick him up because he is so stinking cute!!  

What do we look like?:  They both have a little more hair on top of their heads.  But both would still probably be classified as "baldy babies".  Jakob's hair has gotten a bit darker.  However, I still think he will have dirty blonde hair with blue eyes.  His eyes continue to get lighter each day.  Alex on the other hand has dark brown hair and his eyes continue to remain brown in color.

How are the mommies doing?:  We are doing good.

I seem to be falling a part at the seams.  I had heard that once you hit about the 3 month or 4 month postpartum period your body goes to the crapper.  And that is the truth.  My hair is falling out in clumps.  I have no idea how I am not bald.  We have to clean out the shower drain on a regular basis.  I have never had sinus issues and I am not battling them on a daily basis.  I feel like I have been punched in the nose 100 times.  I still have not gotten my first postpartum period (thank you pumping) and to tell you the truth I am dreading it.  My fingernails are also super brittle.  Weird.  

I seem to have more and more clogged ducts that drive me crazy and cause me a lot of pain when they happen.  The good news?  I am getting more sleep at night which has actually helped my milk production.  I am still pumping six times a day (1:30 am, 5:30 am, 9:30 am, 1:30 pm, 5:30 pm, 8:30 pm) and I average about 61 oz per day.  The boys are drinking 60 oz per day and we have about 250 oz of frozen breast milk. I am still crossing my fingers that I can keep them on only breast milk for as long as possible.  My minimum goal will be six months.  However, I would like to drop to five pumps per day at some point in October so we will see if that impacts my milk production at all.  It makes me nervous.

Kara is still my superhero.  She is such an amazing mother and partner.  Our house would be in shambles without her.  She takes care of the boys all day long and still manages to cook and clean the house.  Not to mention she is solely responsible for taking the dogs out several times a day.  And because she spends so much time with the boys she knows all the tricks of the trade.  She is often able to tell me what works and doesn't work so that I don't have to spend hours figuring things out myself.  She is an amazing mother!!

Mary