a roller coaster of emotions

The last several days have been filled with every emotion in the book.  I am pregnant.

I decided to test out my trigger shot again this month.  However, unlike previous months I never really got a negative test.  I also was fairly symptom free except for the residual effects from the trigger shot.  I will try to break down the last several days

8dpiui - This was the first day that I noticed anything.  I had some fairly significant cramping during the afternoon.  I actually got a bit nervous as I assumed it was the normal cramping I get the days leading up to my period.  I was still getting a BFP on the test strips.  This was still residual HCG from the trigger shot.

9dpiui - No symptoms.  The cramps disappeared.  This is not normal.  I typically have cramping several days leading up to my period.  I was still getting a BFP on the test strips.  This was still residual HCG from the tigger shot.

10piui - No symptoms.  I also still had no cramps and I noticed that I was not getting any of the other symptoms that I normally get prior to my period.  The line on the test strip this morning was very faint.  However, there was still a line.

11dpui - No symptoms.  There was a line on the test strip this morning but it was again very faint.  I asked Kara to look at the test and she said she could see a very, very faint line.  I actually started to get concerned at this point thinking that the batch of tests strips that I purchased were faulty.  

12dpiui - There was a definite line on the test strip today.  I also started to get cramps.  The cramps were not severe but there lasted the majority of the day.  Kara and I made a decision that we would purchase a digital test and I would take that test in the morning.  I also made Kara pee on one of the test strips to make certain the tests were not faulty.  This was not one of my finer moments but it did prove that the tests were not faulty.  I woke up in the middle of the night (between day 12 and day 13) extremely nauseous.

I do want to share one story from this day.  I need to remember it.  I always lock myself in the bathroom when I am taking a test.  The moment the line popped up I just had a feeling (for the first time ever) that this was the real deal.  I was pregnant.  I bolted out of the bathroom and ran into Kara in the hallway.  I think I said, "There is definitely a second line today."  And I will never ever forget the look on Kara's face.  Her eyes got as big as saucers.  And she got a nervous smile on her face.  It was a wonderful moment.  

13dpiui - The digital test said "Yes".  I of course ran and jumped on the bed only to get a half groggy response from Kara.  That's what I get for testing at 4am and waking my lady out of a deep sleep.  The cramping continued all day.  I also used another test strip and while there was a line I think it was lighter than the line from the day before.  We allowed ourselves to be thrilled for a couple of hours.  We had a day trip planned to Erie, PA to visit with Kara's family.  We stopped to use the restroom a couple of hours into the trip and I noticed that I was spotting.  Oh the cuss words that came out of my mouth.  The spotting was minimal but noticeable.  At this point it was all old blood.  I called my really good friend and she managed to talk me off the ledge.  However, by the time we got to Erie, PA the spotting had increased and it included some pinkish blood.  The rest of the day was an emotional blur.  We actually ended up leaving early because I was once again dealing with being nauseous.  The spotting slowed down significantly by the time we got home.  I also seem to have an increased sense of smell.    

14dpiui - I spent the entire night being nauseous.  I took another digital test this morning and it said "Yes".  However, I am still spotting but it only appears to be old blood at the moment.  It is not enough for a tampon.  I am also still cramping and I am extremely tired but cannot seem to sleep.    

Here is the proof from 13dpiui and 14dpiui.

I will call my RE in the morning to report the positive pregnancy test that I got 14dpiui.  I am extremely nervous because the spotting continues.  I know that it is often completely normal to spot early in a pregnancy but it is not doing anything to help reassure me that this pregnancy will continue.  I also know that there is nothing I can do at this point.  I am trying to take it easy.  I must remember that today I am pregnant.  

Mary