12.14.12

I was at work yesterday and I got this picture from Kara. 

It was a perfect picture.  I promptly sent the picture to Grandma and Grandpa with the words, "How does this not make the world seem perfect in the morning?"  It was 8:00 am.

But the world was not perfect.  There was a monster man in Connecticut who was preparing to ruin the lives of innocent children.  A man with so much evil running through his body that he did not hesitate to take the life of a helpless child.  To take the lives of a room full of helpless children.  What caused the evil?  I don't know.  And at the moment I will be honest and say that I do not care.  We can debate the facts later.  Today I only speak as a mother.   

I received a text message from Kara at 11:17 am "What the hell is wrong with people?  There was another school shooting at an elementary school."

I will be honest.  I did not respond to the text message.  I've become numb to such news.    

I NEVER in a million years thought that there was a room full of dead children somewhere in an elementary school in the United States.  I thought domestic violence.  Another dead teacher.  Let's move on with the day.    

But then I went home for lunch.  And the newscasters were getting very nervous.  And then it happened ... The world stopped spinning and for a moment I heard nothing but "20 children dead".

I held the boys tighter.  I cried.  Kara cried.  I was scared out of my mind.  How do I raise my boys in an evil world?  How do I one day but a book bag over their shoulders and send them off into the world?  How do I promise them that there is safety in the classroom?  How do I get up in the morning and not expect another tragedy to occur?  

I cannot imagine the pain of the parents who lost a child (or children) yesterday.  I do not think I would be able to live.  I told Kara that yesterday.  Her response, "I know."  

I pray for the children.  I pray for the families.  I pray for their souls.  I pray that the fear they experienced and the pain that they felt is long forgotten.  I pray that yesterday God welcomed a classroom of precious children into the kingdom of heaven with open arms.  I envision these children running free today.  They are free from a world of hate.

Mary